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Tatu 10

Life On Mars Dimension Crash Crossovers

Posted on 2008.10.10 at 14:57
Current Mood:: tiredtired
Current Music:: Blink-182 - Heres Your Letter
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So last week I expounded on some of the TV programs I come across on a regular basis in my position of 'dimension collision repairman'. Well I thought that since it was so popular I'd recount some of the strange programs borne of the result of a crash I experienced last year.

This crash took place in the Life on Mars zone of the dimensiverse and as such all programs therein were renamed based on an appropriate David Bowie song.

Firstly in the crash between dimensions Emerald-09 and British Racing Green-31 the hit TV show "Dead Man Walking" was created. It was caused by a melding of Life on Mars and Angel. In it Angel was hit by a meteor and when he woke up he was back in time, back to the year 1890 when he was still Angelus. Angel teams up with current slayer, Angelique Hawthorne, in order to attempt to thwart Angelus, Darla, Spike and Drusilla's evil plans. One problem that this series had was that all the main characters were known to have survived. This problem was addressed when it was shown that Angel, not being of that time, had the power to alter events. This was illustrated when he killed Darla again during the first season season finale (as if Darla didn't have enough death scenes already).
In the second series Angel had to cope with events drifting dramatically from their original course of events. Angelus, Spike and Drusilla instead of making their merry way around the globe killing and feeding like they had done, were now enthused with purpose and determination to bring Angel and Angelique down. In the season finale Angel realised that thanks to killing Darla his past self had been so focused on killing him that he'd never killed a certain gypsy girl and been cursed to have a soul. To stop the future, and his soul, from unravelling Angel kills the gypsy girl himself so that the gypsys will curse his past self and order can be restored.

Thanks to a collision betwen Lime-04 and Chartreuse-30 the program Heroes was born. Not Heroes like it is in this dimension. No this is Heroes like the David Bowie song. In it Sam Tyler goes back to 1973 and meets Gene Hunt and wonders if he's back in time, going mad or in a coma, just like the normal Life on Mars except then everyone gets powers.

  • Sam realises he has the power to travel in time and that he is actually back in time.

  • Gene has the power to overwrite people's free will by shouting at them.

  • Chris has the power to transform jam to any other flavour of jam.

  • Ray has the power to incapacitate people with a high pitched shriek, but he very rarely uses this power because he thinks it makes him sound like a right nancy.

  • Annie has the power to make people confused and doubtful about their powers (and constantly uses it on Sam to confuse him as to whether he's actually back in time, or mad or in a coma).

  • and finally Phyllis has the power of super strength but since she doesn't actually go and fight any criminals nobody ever finds out.

The crash betwen Teagreen-14 and Jade-77 was so bad that it completely mangled House and Life on Mars in order to produce the one off program called Rebel Rebel. In it Doctor Gregory House, a diagnostician with constant pain and a limp, was hit by a car and found himself in the past. A week in the past to be precise. So he solves a complex illness (something which takes him about a week) and then everything is back to normal. This may not sound too bad but consider that the entire serieses of Life on Mars and House were destroyed to make way for this one off program and you'll see that even dimension crashes like these have their tragic sides.

And last but not least is the weirdest program to come out of this particular dimension crash: "Mars On Mars" Straight from the smoking remains of Jungle Green-01 and Persian Green-99; it's a melding of Life on Mars and Veronica Mars, in which Veronica Mars accidentally falls back in time to when her father was the sheriff. She has to keep her father from becoming the type of policeman that he hates, while running her own detective agency (Venus Investigations (she's working under the assumed identity of Veronica Venus)), attempt to solve a big mystery and figure out how to get back to her own time period.
The second series is where it gets properly weird. The big mystery she's investigating is somewhat unusual in nature and she theorises it could be what sent her back in time. It's a massive dimension crash, the same one that caused the programs to merge. It turns out that Richard Casablancas (Dick and Beaver's father) is responsible. Someone found out that he picked up some money on the street and didn't take it to the police station to see if the proper owner would come forth. To stop that person from telling anyone Richard attached a quantum antimatter bomb (that a friend of his had just invented) to a bus. However the quantum antimatter bomb was too powerful and it blew a hole in the dimension itself. This apparently caused time to ripple throwing Veronica back in time and caused the dimension to run off it's course and collide with all the other dimensions.
Strangely it appears that this fictional event; a result of the merging of the two programs, which was caused by the dimension crash, actually caused the dimension crash.

Oh and by the way. The cast of the new US version of Life On Mars look more peculiar than the cast of any of the dimension crash versions I saw. And I saw some pretty weird casts, for example in one version Gene was a giant wasp and Sam was a cloud of purple smoke.

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