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Tatu 58

Random Review - Homecoming

Posted on 2008.03.13 at 11:21
Current Music:: Doug Walker - The Mystery
Tags: , , , , , , ,
So it's time to randomly review something. Now this week the sheer randomness and unpredictability of the universe (and the random article button on wikipedia) has selected a sombre poem which is an enditement on wars and all that kind of thing. So just in case my review gets a bit boring I have lesbians ready and waiting; poised to revitalize the thing.

Okay so I have the whole poem in front of me and I could read it and then review it on artistic merit but where's the challenge in that? I'd much rather review it on a couple of randomly clutched facts hastily garnered from the background information. So here we go. It was written by a man called Bruce Dawe in 1968 and was in a collection of poems called Sometimes Gladness: Collected Poems, 1954 - 1992. It is an antiwar poem and is about the Vietnam War. It describes the process of collecting and processing the dead from a war and shipping them home. Boredom Alert!

Okay so that's the tedious background information sufficiently expounded upon. What next? Well for one thing the collection of poems sounds pretty random. 1954-1992? That's the most random selection of years ever. You might as well have a collection of poems from 1912-1967. There's no logic there. It's just two years randomly pulled out of hat. Which gives this book creditability I reckon. If only because now we're headed into the second factor of randomness. Someone has randomly picked years for a book and now I've randomly selected that book to review. It's like some kind of delicate intricate pattern of fate or something. Maybe one day someone will randomly review this and so on until the whole world is caught up in the random threads emanating from this one poem... Unlikely Alert!

This is the best way to do a review. When you think you've waffled on a bit much just stick in a picture of lesbians. Professional reviewists could learn something from me I reckon. I'm like a pioneer in reviewing at the moment. Maybe one day in the distant future reviewers will look back on this review as the day that it all changed. That reviewing became something of an art-form. Then they'd review this. And soon someone might review their review of this review. And so on until the entire planet is engulfed in reviews of my review... Unlikely Alert Again!

I'm really pleased that I managed to engulf the planet in reactions to my review twice within the same review. But I really must say that the awesome lesbians that keep revitalising my review are from here. Which is a really good website. I haven't joined or anything but it looks pretty good from the free tour. Admittedly you can't save any of the pictures to your hard drive (and why would you want to. It's not like anyone does that or anything) but there is a lot of them and even a couple of videos in the free tour as well. Although the probably the best part of the site (in a sort of ironic way) is the art segment. No pornographic material, nothing sexy or whatever. Just random drawings. It's either a really clever marketing ploy or one of the strangest things I've ever seen. It's either the big faceless porn company (not a company that makes faceless porn, because that's weird. But a faceless company that makes porn) thinking 'aha! we can lure people in with this because it'll make it seem like a real persons site!' or it's a real person just being a bit weird and putting random drawings in amongst the porn. Overexcitement Alert!

Okay getting a bit too carried away there, so a sad crying woman will bring us back to normality. Sombre us down a bit. Look at how sad she is. She's probably just had to read the poem Homecoming and now she's sad that she's wasted valuable seconds of her life. In summary. I haven't read the poem but porn is better.

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