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No Face

Randomitis

Posted on 2007.01.02 at 20:13
Tags: , , , , , , , ,
I was just sat here with some prime material for posting with and thinking to myself, do i dare? Do i dare to post five times in one day? More than I have ever done any time before ever. This may not even be safe, the computer may implode with the sheer amount of things I seem to want to say today, but as you can already see this then I must have gone through with it. Logically. Unless you've broken into my brain and are reading it from there or something. In which case get out, or I'll break into your face. Anyway I'm on tag duty today. To sort out the tags that have coagulated into some kind of evil mass of randomness. It's not hard work, but it sure is long winded. I mean don't get me wrong, I wouldn't rather be kicking a donkey down a mine, whatever that means.

Anyway here I am with words and sentences and punctuation and everything and I'm going to slap it down and it's going to make your face explode. Theese are random thoughts that I've had in my head for a while now and need extricating into something a bit better than a text file on my computer.

A cat born in an oven isn’t a cake. This is true.
Go go Sir Paul McCartney! You can defeat the evil Flood! Also true, also I predicted that Sir Paul could defeat the monster, normally only found in Halo, long before his current spat with Greedy Mrs Oneleg or whatever her name is.
A robotic cat with all the powers of a regular cat. There is probably one of these around nowadays which proves that the government is ripping thoughts out of my head and making them. Well rip this thought out of my head and market it!
I Ching. U Ching. We All Ching. I don't know what I Ching is but I'd be prepared to bet that I've made a clever joke from it anyway. Or at least that I've made a joke from it.
Indiana Cube and The Search For The Secret Lesbians. I will one day make this into a fully fledged feature. The way it's going I'll probably end up doing it by the end of the day.
The theory of relativity as explained by a donkey with a headache: This joke is lacking a punchline. Send your punchlines to the normal address on a stamped addressed envelope.
“how many frogs?” “12” “It was a hypothetical question” This joke only works with no context, as that's the way it was born. The twelve isn't how many frogs there actually is, for there are no frogs. The people don't even exist.
If my mind was a chipshop then it would be a very poorly run chipshop. This is also true.
The Deadly Dance of the Flamenco Ninja. That's so going into a book. I'm going to write a book just so I can have a chapter entitled The Deadly Dance of the Flamenco Ninja.

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