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Heroes - Eclipse

It's My Birthday and I'll Post Excessively If I Want To!

Posted on 2008.07.23 at 20:52
Current Mood:: happyhappy
Tags: , , , , , ,
Okay so I enjoyed coming up with superheroes for the random review to such an extent I thought the only sensible course of action was to ressurect the feature Zeroes. For those who don't want to or can't be bothered to click onto there what essentially happens in Zeroes is I come up with ideas for superheroes/villains which are rubbish but hopefully amusingly rubbish.
So I thought that the first edition of Zeroes wasn't too awe-inspiring. As is evidenced by the fact I didn't do any more. I thought that it might be better if each edition had a theme to base superheroes/villains around. Any guesses on what the theme is going to be. That's right. Birthdays.


If you're having a birthday related disaster there's only one man qualified to save you. It's Krohn; the World's Oldest Man! Thanks to a mutation he had at birthday every single day is Krohn's birthday. If he were a normal person he'd be just 18 but thanks to his bizarre genetic mutation he's six thousand five hundred and seventy four years old. He operates out of his Nursing Home Lair in Sunny Florida. His genetic mutation gives him psychic abilities, the strength of a hundred men of his age (which is about the normal strength of one man) and the stylistic flair of a pinata dressed as a prostitute. He uses a razor sharp walking stick as his main weapon and he travels via motorised wheelchair. Wherever he goes he travels with two highly skilled assassin nurses codenamed Pleasure and Pain. With split second reactions, full weapons training and nerves of steel these sexy nursassins are always there to help Krohn get one step up on his enemies.

On the other end of the Birthday spectrum there is The Black Birthday. The Black Birthday's origins are obfuscated in mystery. The only thing anyone knows for sure about him is that he has no Birthday. His journey into the world of villainy is well documented though. He was a normal guy with normal friends and a normal job until one day he was invited to a birthday. He went out of curiosity and marvelled for hours at the games, the fun, the cake, the festivities. It was that day that his heart turned deathly black. Envious of our birthdays The Black Birthday seeks to undermine or destroy them. The exact extent of his powers are unknown but one thing is for sure. When anyone in the world has a bad birthday. A birthday without friends or love or presents or cake then the Black Birthday is there behind the scenes ruining whatever it takes to destroy the birthday.

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